He came, he shattered and he went away like a wisp.
He did what no man was allowed to do, what some had done before but not better than him.
His doing couldn't be undone, his doing may never be undone.
Imagine if you have dreamt of climbing a mountain for a long time in your life. You have dreamt, aspired, anticipated, planned, played it out mentally, thought and spoken about it. You save up for years, you almost make an unrealistic fantasy in your mind as it seems almost impossible to achieve, and you finally decide to make it happen. You buy just the right shoes, and you pack just the right stuff, you gear up just well enough and begin your journey with an undeterred spirit and a heart full of glowing hope and aspirations. The journey begins well, you are excited with the progress, each step makes the wait even more worthwhile as the excitement of finally reaching the summit is taking over you. Gradually, you reach the final step and the summit awaits in all of its glory once you are atop.
As soon as you set your first foot on the mountain top, you breathe in and wish to take in this experience to the best of of lung capacity and before that first breath is complete, you get imbalanced and come tumbling down. All the way down, tumbling down to your very beginning. How would you feel ?
On the 10th of October, I was fortunate enough to be alive and had the opportunity of witnessing my favourite artist on stage. Skrillex aka Sony Moore has been the godfather of Dubstep ever since the genre emerged & I have been a die hard fan ever since Dubstep was introduced to India. It would only make sense for me to go and attend his magically charged live performance if and when he decided to come to India after my daily writings on his social media wall, my regular liking of all his pictures and sometimes creepily close stalking all of his activities. I was beyond ecstatic upon hearing the news of his arrival, the emotion resembled the one Rakhi experienced upon the return of the reincarnated versions of Karan and Arjun ( Bollywood reference ). It seemed like finally I had something to look forward to after a very long time and finally something noteworthy and 100% happy was happening. A day was about to approach which required immense 'planning', my adrenalin rush off late.
I began preparations very soon after the announcement of his performance became public, shopping and finding the best gear/ accessories for my 'gig' look, booking my tickets as soon as they were available, ironing my clothes two months in advance, beginning the countdown in my journal and much more. The 10th did seem too good to be true but the pinch marks were a standing testimony to the fact that even at 25, one can feel like a school girl in the presence of her first crush.
Never had I ever imagined in my weirdest, wildest or most baffling dreams what would or could happen on that day. When some tragedy takes place amidst all regular occurrences, it is a surprise, it is a sad incident, it is unexpected and disappointing but when something bad strikes you at a point where you had expected to be greeted by the best, it is indeed an indescribable feeling.
An artist of a magnitude as majestic as Skrillex called for not one, not two but 4 opening acts. Four of the best indian DJs entertained and warmed the stage while the maestro waited for his turn, the final showdown. I was happy, I was so full of one consistent emotion ( gratitude/glee) which is a rarity for me until that second when he came on stage. I had made my way through a crowd of sweaty, trippy and sozzled males who thankfully did not indulge in the expected- misdemeanour. As soon as I saw him take his first step on stage, I turned to take my phone out of my purse so as to capture the historical moment. It was time, it was here and I couldn't believe it was happening and I was watching it happen. The very moment he came on stage, I turned to take out my phone and upon opening my purse realised that my wallet containing my cash, credit and debit cards, identity card, house keys and a few other things was missing. Panic, mayhem, pandemonium and chaos surrounded me and I in my misery sought this readily available company amidst a crowd that was brimming with energy and happiness.
I felt my entrails and my physical being be torn, I could see and sense the shreds inside me go in two different directions. Never in my life have I felt so equally divided with no bias towards any emotion. I was shocked, sad, angry at someone flicking my wallet, this being absolutely undeserved and uncalled for with the icing on the cake being the timing- the exact second that I saw him, for the very first time in my life. I was joyous as what I had waited for for coming true but I was so heart broken at the mini tragedy which had struck. After turning every possible stone that I could come across, I couldn't accept or face the fact that something SO opposite to what I had anticipated had happened. Frustration combined with helplessness and an undying feeling of loss surely invited the waterworks which did not seem to stop till the next day. I do not say this just for the effect but this was the worst heart break of my entire life. I have never been hurt as much as I was that day, ironically by someone who was God like for me but had no role to play in this entire episode.
Sometimes when you build a certain set of expectations and attach too many emotions to it, something huge is destined to come out of it, it is a make or break situation. I have always kept my emotions to a minimum after having being disappointed a LOT as a child but I couldn't control myself this time. I have felt a personal connection with S, perhaps because the timeline of my discovery of his music matched exactly with a major transformation stage in my life. I have undergone and emerged out of a personal struggle while Skrillex soothed my soul during an episode of mental turbulence. It was impossible for me not to be attached to him. I know my love maybe too much, but I idolize him and there are no two ways about it.
After emerging from any strife in my life, I tend to channelise all my energy in appreciating the beauty of the learnings/lessons which have come out of it. This day was an exception.
He did what no man was allowed to do, what some had done before but not better than him.
His doing couldn't be undone, his doing may never be undone.
Imagine if you have dreamt of climbing a mountain for a long time in your life. You have dreamt, aspired, anticipated, planned, played it out mentally, thought and spoken about it. You save up for years, you almost make an unrealistic fantasy in your mind as it seems almost impossible to achieve, and you finally decide to make it happen. You buy just the right shoes, and you pack just the right stuff, you gear up just well enough and begin your journey with an undeterred spirit and a heart full of glowing hope and aspirations. The journey begins well, you are excited with the progress, each step makes the wait even more worthwhile as the excitement of finally reaching the summit is taking over you. Gradually, you reach the final step and the summit awaits in all of its glory once you are atop.
As soon as you set your first foot on the mountain top, you breathe in and wish to take in this experience to the best of of lung capacity and before that first breath is complete, you get imbalanced and come tumbling down. All the way down, tumbling down to your very beginning. How would you feel ?
On the 10th of October, I was fortunate enough to be alive and had the opportunity of witnessing my favourite artist on stage. Skrillex aka Sony Moore has been the godfather of Dubstep ever since the genre emerged & I have been a die hard fan ever since Dubstep was introduced to India. It would only make sense for me to go and attend his magically charged live performance if and when he decided to come to India after my daily writings on his social media wall, my regular liking of all his pictures and sometimes creepily close stalking all of his activities. I was beyond ecstatic upon hearing the news of his arrival, the emotion resembled the one Rakhi experienced upon the return of the reincarnated versions of Karan and Arjun ( Bollywood reference ). It seemed like finally I had something to look forward to after a very long time and finally something noteworthy and 100% happy was happening. A day was about to approach which required immense 'planning', my adrenalin rush off late.
I began preparations very soon after the announcement of his performance became public, shopping and finding the best gear/ accessories for my 'gig' look, booking my tickets as soon as they were available, ironing my clothes two months in advance, beginning the countdown in my journal and much more. The 10th did seem too good to be true but the pinch marks were a standing testimony to the fact that even at 25, one can feel like a school girl in the presence of her first crush.
Never had I ever imagined in my weirdest, wildest or most baffling dreams what would or could happen on that day. When some tragedy takes place amidst all regular occurrences, it is a surprise, it is a sad incident, it is unexpected and disappointing but when something bad strikes you at a point where you had expected to be greeted by the best, it is indeed an indescribable feeling.
An artist of a magnitude as majestic as Skrillex called for not one, not two but 4 opening acts. Four of the best indian DJs entertained and warmed the stage while the maestro waited for his turn, the final showdown. I was happy, I was so full of one consistent emotion ( gratitude/glee) which is a rarity for me until that second when he came on stage. I had made my way through a crowd of sweaty, trippy and sozzled males who thankfully did not indulge in the expected- misdemeanour. As soon as I saw him take his first step on stage, I turned to take my phone out of my purse so as to capture the historical moment. It was time, it was here and I couldn't believe it was happening and I was watching it happen. The very moment he came on stage, I turned to take out my phone and upon opening my purse realised that my wallet containing my cash, credit and debit cards, identity card, house keys and a few other things was missing. Panic, mayhem, pandemonium and chaos surrounded me and I in my misery sought this readily available company amidst a crowd that was brimming with energy and happiness.
I felt my entrails and my physical being be torn, I could see and sense the shreds inside me go in two different directions. Never in my life have I felt so equally divided with no bias towards any emotion. I was shocked, sad, angry at someone flicking my wallet, this being absolutely undeserved and uncalled for with the icing on the cake being the timing- the exact second that I saw him, for the very first time in my life. I was joyous as what I had waited for for coming true but I was so heart broken at the mini tragedy which had struck. After turning every possible stone that I could come across, I couldn't accept or face the fact that something SO opposite to what I had anticipated had happened. Frustration combined with helplessness and an undying feeling of loss surely invited the waterworks which did not seem to stop till the next day. I do not say this just for the effect but this was the worst heart break of my entire life. I have never been hurt as much as I was that day, ironically by someone who was God like for me but had no role to play in this entire episode.
Sometimes when you build a certain set of expectations and attach too many emotions to it, something huge is destined to come out of it, it is a make or break situation. I have always kept my emotions to a minimum after having being disappointed a LOT as a child but I couldn't control myself this time. I have felt a personal connection with S, perhaps because the timeline of my discovery of his music matched exactly with a major transformation stage in my life. I have undergone and emerged out of a personal struggle while Skrillex soothed my soul during an episode of mental turbulence. It was impossible for me not to be attached to him. I know my love maybe too much, but I idolize him and there are no two ways about it.
After emerging from any strife in my life, I tend to channelise all my energy in appreciating the beauty of the learnings/lessons which have come out of it. This day was an exception.
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